Tuesday, 25 August 2009


What: G.I Joe: The Rise of Cobra

Who: Channing Tatum, Marlon Wayans, Sienna Miller, Rachel Nichols, Dennis Quaid, Lee Byung-hun and a bunch of other people

When: 2009

I love ninjas! Ninjas are awesome, when I grow up I want to be a ninja. Don't you think ninjas are the coolest thing ever? Ok, I think I'm done professing my love for ninjas, I should get started on the review.

Yes, I went to see G.I Joe: The Rise of Cobra, to be honest I was expecting it to be a very crappy film. However, I was pleasantly surprised by an old school action movie, where the villain has an underwater lair and an evil scientist to help him out, the good guys kick serious ass and everything ends well.

Actually, the only reason why I decided to go see this movie was because I saw a pretty good amount of ninjas in the trailer. But the best part is that there's a shirtless fighting scene between of them! (I like Asian guys... so sue me)

The plot revolved around James McCullen's (an arms dealer) super evil plan to take over the world (don't you just love a classic?). To do so he asked his mad/evil scientist to develop crazy new nanotechnology capable of chewing through pretty much anything. So he destroys the Eiffel Tower, kills a bunch of people and asks Anna (who was previously brainwashed) to do his dirty work while wearing tight outfits.

At the end, the evil/mad scientist (who's actually Ana's brother, Rex, who was allegedly dead) uses a silver mask made of nano-mites to heal Cullen's injuries (he burnt himself while running
away from the good guys), tells him that his name from now on
is Destro (the same name his medieval ancestor had after being forced to use an incandescent iron mask for the rest of his life) and tells McCullen to call him Commander (at this point he already has a new and scarier suit on and his voice dropped a few eighths), both of them try to escape in a submarine but they end up arrested (poor bastards), the girl is "unbrainwashed" and goes back to Duke (a hunky soldier) and the evil ninja is presumably (PRESUMABLY!) killed by his adoptive brother.

Can anyone say... sequel?

(I'm guessing this last part was confusing, but I'm too lazy to rewrite it)

Rating: Oh yay!

Monday, 10 August 2009

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince

What: Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince (Movie)

Who: Daniel Radcliffe, Emma Watson, Rupert Grint, Alan Rickman and all the usual people.

When: July 15th, 2009

Harry Potter, Harry Potter, Harry Potter yay! A new Harry Potter movie! Oh, the joy! Nah nah nah, lala la.


And that's all I'm going to say. I cannot review a Harry Potter movie, I'm not worthy.

I will tell you this: I liked it a lot and I believe Snape has never been sexier...

Breaking News

I just read that there's going to be a Mission Impossible 4


God help us all.